Who knows what the week has in store for you. Maybe a big fat pay day or a big ass boo-boo. One thing is for sure that I know without a doubt. Half the thrill of the battle is waiting to see how things turn out.
This week is not destined and there’s much to be told. So sit back and be patient as the scroll unfolds.
When you’ve run out of “woulds,” and “shoulds,” and “coulds…” who’s the first person you think of?
HOTTYWOOD!
Below are Hottywood’s cookie fortunes as revealed by the moon and the sun, in addition to the itch on the bottom of his foot.
_________________________________________________________
Capricorn
December 22 – January 19
Give yourself the option of not making losing an option. _________________________________________________________
Aquarius
January 20 – February 18
The soul of a boy trapped in the body of a man is a double bladed sword.
_________________________________________________________
Pisces
February 19 – March 20
Falling on your ass makes you appreciate standing on your feet.
_________________________________________________________
Aries
March 21 – April 19
By a gerbil. Name it Bitch. That way you’ll have a legitimate reason for telling people you have to go home to feed your bitch.
_________________________________________________________
Taurus
April 20 – May 20
Winning is everything when you have everything to lose. _________________________________________________________
Gemini
May 21 – June 20
It’s not good if you have enough hair on your knees to grate cheese.
_________________________________________________________
Cancer
June 21 – July 22
Only a true friend would advise a pal against getting corn-rows when he has a bald spot in the crown of his head.
_________________________________________________________
Leo
July 23 – August 22
Consider it bad luck to mistake a pooper scooper for your hair brush.
_________________________________________________________
Virgo
August 23 – September 22
Answer all phone calls using sign language.
_________________________________________________________
Libra
September 23 – October 22
All the things you are unclear about will be just as confusing at the end of the day.
_________________________________________________________
Scorpio
October 23 – November 21
Do not plan on getting hit by a moving bus without giving your job two weeks notice, first.
_________________________________________________________
Sagittarius
November 22 – December 21
Your chance of dying on your way to get a lottery ticket is greater than your chances of winning.
_________________________________________________________
